A l'époque alors que je proposais des séances en massage préconceptionnel, je suis arrivée au constat suivant: lorsqu'une femme a vécu un deuil

périnatal dans son passé proche ou lointain, il arrive que son corps et son système endocrinien se mettent au repos et refusent de démarrer une nouvelle grossesse!
J'ai donc analysé et réfléchi aux raisons qui poussaient leur corps à devenir infertile et ce dont il aurait besoin pour s'ouvrir à nouveau à accueillir un bébé. La réponse principale à ce questionnement se résume ainsi: le corps, comme un livre ouvert, a parfois besoin de finir un chapitre pour pouvoir en ouvrir un nouveau! Ainsi, j'ai construit un soin spécifique pour le deuil périnatal afin d'aider leur corps, et particulièrement la zone du bassin, à libérer l'emprunte émotionnelle du deuil et pouvoir éventuellement accepter une nouvelle grossesse.
Depuis lors de plus, en plus de femmes manifestent le besoin de recevoir le soin NatalLa® conseillées, souvent, par les milieux hospitaliers, les psychothérapeutes, les sage-femmes, ostéopathes, kinésiologues, ... .
Ce soin psycho-corporel et énergétique s'adresse principalement aux mamanges c'est-à-dire aux femmes ayant traversé cet évènement particulièrement douloureux qu'est la perte d'un bébé pendant la grossesse ou après la naissance. Notre culture minimise encore trop souvent le vécu de ces femmes et ne se rend pas toujours compte du temps dont le coeur et le corps ont besoin pour trouver la paix après un tel bouleversement.
Parmi les situations rencontrées, j'accueille les femmes ayant vécu:
- un ou plusieurs arrêts naturels de grossesse (communément appelés fausses couches)
- une interruption de grossesse (quelque soit la raison)
- une mort foetale
- le décès de leur bébé après la naissance
Il nous arrive aussi de recevoir des femmes ayant vécu des violences obstétricales ou des abus et qui sentent encore leur corps, leurs organes génitaux, leur ventre en souffrance. L'objectif sera aussi de leur permettre d'installer à nouveau une relation de tendresse avec leur corps.
Ce qui différencie la méthode NatalLa® d'autres méthodes de massage c'est tout d'abord le temps d'accueil assez long qui permet d'installer la confiance et l'intimité entre la praticienne et la femme. Celle-ci se dépose en douceur et partage ses difficultés et ses attentes. La praticienne pourra ainsi personnaliser le soin plutôt que d'appliquer un protocole. Elle explique également la symbolique et les étapes du soin afin que la femme se sente enveloppée dans un cocon sécuritaire. Après l'accompagnement verbal, la femme est invitée à s'installer sur la table où elle est couverte d'un plaid doux et chaud pendant que la praticienne lit, en général, une visualisation. Ce texte de guérison, je l'ai écrit il a quelques années, le jour où une cliente m'a exprimé ne pas arriver à faire le deuil de sa maternité. A l'époque une nouvelle grossesse n'était plus envisageable pour elle pour une question de santé et elle avait vécu de nombreuses fausses couches qui avaient encore un impact émotionnel important dans sa vie. Résultat: elle vivait un certain épuisement mais également un espèce d'immobilisme dans sa vie, la rendant incapable, par exemple, de changer de boulot alors que celui-ci ne lui convenait plus du tout. Comme son deuil datait de plusieurs années, j'ai réfléchi à un texte qui pourrait l'aider à rassembler tout ce que ces pertes pouvaient encore signifier pour elle et accueillir les émotions qui pouvaient émaner de ces arrêts de grossesse. L'effet du texte couplé au massage fut juste bluffant: en quelques semaines elle a retrouvé une énergie incroyable, elle a quitté son travail pour se lancer avec vivacité dans une nouvelle carrière plus adaptée à la femme qu'elle était devenue. Elle a aussi retrouvé une belle joie de vivre qui a, naturellement, rayonné sur sa famille et son couple. Depuis, j'ai écris de nombreuses visualisations pour le deuil périnatal pouvant s'adapter aux différentes situations rencontrées.
Après la lecture du texte, la praticienne, en silence, offre un massage à l'huile tiédie, global, d'environ une heure qui vise à :
- Ouvrir le coeur et accueillir les émotions du deuil
- Calmer le système nerveux, le mental
- Dégager les peurs, les émotions difficiles
- Aider le corps à se détendre le plus profondément possible
- Ancrer la maman
- Rassembler le corps, l'aider à se refermer physiquement et énergétiquement
C'est un peu comme si on invitait le corps à clôturer une tranche de vie, à boucler une boucle pour faire de la place pour du nouveau, ce qui ne veut absolument pas dire que le bébé est oublié mais il a prend une place beaucoup plus juste, plus douce et moins douloureuse dans le coeur des Mamanges!
Les effets du soin sont nombreux et dépendant aussi de chaque personne et du moment où elle reçoit le soin après son deuil. Les femmes témoignent souvent qu'elles:
- ressentent un apaisement immédiat physique, psychique, émotionnel
- sont plus ancrées et plus aptes à gérer leur quotidien
- retrouvent un rapport plus doux et plus tendre à leur corps
- se sentent libérées de l'emprunte émotionnelle du deuil
- acceptent davantage l'évènement, la perte de leur bébé
- sont libérées des émotions négatives comme la colère ou la culpabilité
- éprouvent davantage de confiance en elle, en la vie
- retrouvent plus d'énergie
- ressentent les qualités nécessaires pour réaliser un nouveau projet de vie qui leur tient à coeur
...
Les femmes qui envisagent un nouveau projet 'bébé s'estiment plus sereines ou sentent parfois, au contraire, qu'elles ont besoin de laisser encore passer un peu de temps pour permettre à leur corps de récupérer. Dans tous les cas, le deuil n'est plus un obstacle à leur fertilité. La grossesse suivante est aussi plus paisible car le corps est dégagé du deuil.
Après le soin, la praticienne laisse un temps d'intégration afin de ramener la femme en douceur vers un état propice à se rhabiller et quitter le lieu. Le temps de parole est souvent plus court. La femme s'exprime uniquement si elle le souhaite. La praticienne fait en sorte qu'elle reparte sereine et veille à ne pas, cette fois, la faire remonter dans son mental ou ses émotions en lui posant trop de questions. Cette sérénité lui permettra dans certaines situations de gérer à nouveau son quotidien avec plus de légèreté, dans d'autres situations de sentir quelle direction elle veut donner à sa vie. Certaines repartent même avec une joie profonde, un sentiment de réconciliation avec leur histoire, leur corps, la vie ...
Laurence Niclaes
Massothérapeute et réflexologue en périnatalité et pédiatrie, haptonome
Centre de formation Le Cœur sur La Main Namur, Flawinne, Belgique
Photo réalisée par Laurent Despontin, Photographe
Plus d'informations sur les séances en deuil périnatal: https://www.massagebebe.be/Soins-apres-un-deuil-perinatal_265.html
Annuaire des praticiennes en Belgique, France et Suisse.
contact@massagebebe.be
0498/ 57 14 13
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